Random Thoughts From The Mind

Well, I must say that things are not going as I had hoped. Most people are quick to leave comments and voice their opinions. Yet, I'm not getting the feedback that I was hoping for. To all of you who continue to read this daily: Thank You! You are what gets me through the days. Today, however, there are no new random thoughts sulking through my brain. There are so many things tumbling over themselves inside there, but truthfully none of them make any sense at this moment. Right now I must say I am feeling a bit overwhelmed and a bit dissatisfied with how everything is going at the moment.  On one hand I am feeling content knowing that I finally got my book published and writing this blog keeps me some what sane. On the other I am left in complete misery. Yes my book is published, but promoting it is a whole other horse altogether. All my extra money is going on christmas like most families at this time and the time that it needs put into it is wearing me thin. I'm about rea

This is some of the first chapter of Approaching Fate that I have written... looking for some feedback. I'm about ready to scrap it and start over... What are your thoughts? Chapter 1             My thoughts tore me away from his arms as though they were thieves stealing everything that I was. They pulled at me until I couldn’t remember the truth of anything anymore. I was lost inside the moment of what felt like death luring me away from his embrace. I fought hard against the nightmares within my mind, but they wrapped themselves around the happiness in my life. Suddenly I felt the world cease around me. Everything I knew was lost, including me.             I felt his hands as he lifted my face towards him, but the tears were hard to fight away. His voice came like a sting to my heart for the same unknown reasons that I sobbed. These feelings were so hard to fight, but it felt like an abyss had just opened inside my soul. Matt pulled me into his chest allowing the beat

Last night I was doing a brief inquiry on life expectancy. Just one of those random things that pops into my head as I'm sitting there watching tv. I was just curious to see how the life expectancy of humans has grown over the years. In just the last 100 years it has nearly doubled. That means we are living twice as long as we were a hundred years ago. I did some math, and I am not a math person by any means, but as we progress in time the rate is getting faster as well. So we are aging quite well these days gaining years faster than humans have done before. No doubt it is because of the medicines and scientists (thank all of you).  Just think about this for a moment though- In the next 100 years we (humans) could double once more our life expectancy. So think about this, right now the  normal life expectancy for a human is around 80 years of age, in a 100 years people could live to be 160 years old, if not longer. It truly makes me wonder how far we will progress as humans as th

https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2017/10/when-kids-have-to-parent-their-siblings-it-affects-them-for-life/543975/ 'Because of this, she says she often distrusts that other people will take care of things. “That’s why I tend to step up and do it myself.”' I do this more than  I think  I should . I never realized this before. I didn't even know there was a name for it or that it was an actual thing. I had always made excuses that it was just the way I was or I'm doing this because my parent never did this with me. (No offense Mom, I love you) I often found myself telling my significant other that I was not going to miss my children's games because my parents were never able to make it to mine. I've always tried to make sure to go to every game, and if I missed one it was either because I was at another game or work. One thing that I did try to make sure of was that if I wasn't able to be there that someone was there for my child, whether it was t

Just a random thought popped into my mind as I read a question from a creative writers group on Facebook: What does your MC fear the most? That's when it truly hit me, in nearly every single one of my stories the main characters fear mostly only one thing above all others. It is not death as one would think rather they are afraid mostly of falling in love and being loved.  Perhaps I need to go see a psychologist about this issue, but I think it is odd.

I want to write so many things right now. My head is just swirling with ideas like life expectancy, the melting pot, deaf voices, except my heart continues to tell me to begin rewriting my Approaching Fate Series. The hardest part about sitting down and rewriting the first book is trying to make it better and change the plot slightly, but keep it basically the same. Then again I also have this thought that maybe I should finish the entire series before actually going back to rewrite the beginning. It is all basically a rough draft and discovering the characters that I eventually want to get out into the world to be read.  My fears are that the life of Ashley is taking this major jump into her fate in this four book that I have begun and I am afraid that it will never end. I have this feeling that her life is just going to continue on no matter how many times I kill her off, her story will never be finished then I will never get to go back to the beginning to rewrite it the way I feel

As a suggestion from a friend, he said that I should put up a top comment of the week up. I think however that this is not only a great idea, but instead of just listing the person and the top comment of the week. The person with the top comment of the week will be selected to provide their own rant and have it placed on this blog.  The person with the top comment may rant about anything they wish or they can also choose to continue any random thought that was placed on this blog. I hope this all goes well, and everyone enjoys it. It gets everyone writing... The top comment will be picked every week on Friday. You will be contacted and then let your random thoughts fly!

'You are glib, breezy and always friendly. But many do not know that you are a philosopher and a truth seeker. Today you might have an experience that inspires you. You might meet someone wise, a guru-like figure. Or you might come to your own epiphany about something.' That was my horoscope for today... I am definitely a philosopher and truth seeker, so I hope truly that I come up with an epiphany, but rather every night I do. I love reading horoscopes because honestly they do not give you advice for a day, but sometimes they actually just describe yourself. Then again if you sit down and read every single one, you can find qualities in all of those that work for yourself regardless of which sign you are.  I absolutely love astrology, religion, and well to put it as said- I am a truth seeker. I love to look at everything in the world and see purpose. I love several things and follow several more things just to see how everything pans out. I question everything, just becaus

Just a quick note to add. While driving I was listening to Linkin Park's newest single. Kind of odd because Chester Bennington just lost his battle with depression, but it put things into perspective.  Please listen to the song... and reflect. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tm8LGxTLtQk   (Thank you for letting me know! Here is the correct link!)

I hate sitting down and reading through the news and seeing horrible things. There is nothing worse though than seeing a child's picture because they were murdered. The worst part of that is not the fact that they are dead, it is the fact that their death was caused by those who were supposed to take care of them. More often than not nowadays I am seeing how all these adoptive parents are abusing and killing the children that they took in to be their own. I don't understand it. First off the fact that they brought these children into their home to create a brighter future for these children. Adopting a child is having a child of your own. They are yours to love and provide for. They took the time to go through the entire process to gain adoption for these children, from which I'm told is a lot of time and money. HOW CAN THEY JUST DO THAT TO GAIN A CHILD TO ABUSE? Second, how are these people allowed to adopt these children? What agency is just giving these children away t

How do you learn if you don't make mistakes? How do you grow if you don't push yourself farther? These are some questions that I found myself asking my son tonight when he was practicing his guitar. I realized that these are questions that we should ask ourselves everyday.  So go ahead ask yourself those two important questions and see where you can place them in your lives... Wish you all well!

There are so many different types of music out there, but I want to talk about music in general. I love music, probably more than most. I listen to a wide variety and honestly if there is a good beat with a general sense of good taste I will listen to it. A lot of people listen to it based on their mood, I however listen to it when writing to get into a certain mood. My kids laugh at me a lot because I will sit and stare blankly at my computer screen listening to everything in my music collection, which ranges from rap to rock to death metal to opera, until I find something that sparks the imagination inside my mind. I have a hard time writing without music, sometimes it is a distraction, but most of the time whatever I am writing reflects the emotion created from the music. Music to me is nothing but pure emotion. Whether it is sad, happy, angry, or moving I listen to the entire mix of emotions. That's when I realized just earlier this weekend watching a music video music is a re

First off I would like to apologize to all my loyal readers that I did not get anything posted over the weekend. It was a busy one and I didn't get much time to actually sit down. However I do have several new topics to write about. One is the relationship between music and emotions, another is the melting pot of the USA, plus many more. Just keep a look out for them.  What I would like to talk about today is family related. This weekend I helped out my family as much as I could. I watched as my family came together to help my Grandmother and Pap Pap. I took a moment to stand back and look over what was being done. Not everyone in the family showed up, but just enough to make me realize that my mother had raised me right. It wasn't just that though, not only had my mother done a great job in teaching me that family comes first and help those who need you, but my Grandmother instilled the same lesson upon her children. They had done such a great job raising their own children

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It is odd don't you think, that we are so consumed by the fear of death that we intimately create different meanings for life, we strive to believe that there are ways to live forever, we search for a life after death. Truthfully, I fear death just as much as the next person. I write about my fears in hopes of overcoming them, but the fact of the matter is I wanted to kill off my main character in Approaching Fate in hopes to gain some idea of what it would be like to die. It was quite within my power to kill her off and let it go, but nope. I couldn't do that. I found a magnificent way to bring her back to live against her will. That is how I dealt with death. I refused to believe it. Life and death are not so simple as to writing a line. Death is not something that you can just experience and say this isn't for me. It is the final stage in life one from which you may not return. Unless it is as some believe and you will be reincarnated as something or someone else.  Dea

The world has become a brighter place for you. No longer does the future look bleak with no promise. You can look into the void and know somewhere, somehow everything will be fine. I look at you and smile knowing now that you have become what I always knew you could be. The darkness of the veil that covered your eyes to the darkness of the future, has been lifted. For the first time, I think you finally see in yourself, what I knew was there the entire time. Impressed with how far you have come in such a short amount of time, But I knew it was there all along.  You couldn't see yourself like I could. Now when you look into the mirror, tell me what do you see? Do you see the brilliance shining from within? I saw it so long ago, Before it was even imagined by your mind. You are a wonderfully brilliant man, I knew it from the beginning, even if no one else saw it. Watching you grow into this being of excellence right before my eyes, Is what most people strive for their

Of course, once again I was thinking about the mental issues of this country because of the war. It was then I realized that there was a slight, not a pattern, but common similarities with all those who have this problem.  In general we are raised watching tv and playing video games. This is where most teenagers and adults alike have one thing in common we are all obsessed (unconsciously) with death. It is every where you look on tv, whether it is a show, or a game, or the news. We have all gotten so used to seeing death on tv that we don't realize what the real thing is like. Then also drilled into our teenagers heads, just like mine was, go into the military because it is the best thing for you. It will help you pay for college, prepare you for the future. They define it as some great thing to do with your life. There is a possibility that you may have to go to war, but that thought is just in the background. While all these teenagers think that yeah, this is a great opportun

Did you hear that?  The crack that busted through, it created such a deep hole.  It has been broken before. A hundred times by you. This I fear is different because I can hear my love seeping through. The waters are over flowing and spilling out. Upon the ground it drains. To your feet as you stare into the unknown. It will not harm you, but you will feel it. Will you ignore it or will you look to see my heart dying for you. My pain is flowing out of this crack that you caused. This is not the first time you created this hole, but this will be the last.  Once it all spills there is no refilling of love this time. I continue to pour it in just to watch it spill out onto the floor. No more refills, Just watch it ans walk away. I wonder if you can feel it die. I watched as it came crashing to the ground.  There was no gliding or floating upon the breeze.  It was so glorious when the sun glimmered on its wings. But then the shadow came and threw it away. I watched as

I got to thinking last night, like most nights, but it revolved around a movie that was playing. Honestly I don't know the name of it, but it was about the mental issues of our soldiers because of the war. If you think about it we are evolving, mentally. Think about the olden days, men would go to war without a second thought and never had such issues with it. It wasn't until lately that all of these 'mental problems' really started to surface. I think as a whole in general we are becoming extremely sensitive to everything. The whole world is becoming offended by small insignificant things and that is okay because we as a world in general are just becoming sensitive minds. One thing that I do find kind of odd those is, we all becoming a bit disturbed though. We have all these 'mental issues' about the world around us, but one of the biggest watched things on tv is drama, mostly crime dramas, where people are dead. We are currently searching for the bad guys in r

One thing that I have learned throughout the years is even if  you are prepared for the worst nothing will stop it from  ripping your heart apart,  but with each passing day the world slowly becomes brighter. The memories that you shared lift up your heart and you carry on. Days are harder than others, but they continue with thoughts of their love carrying us through. Death is a tragedy for those who face is and those who must endure afterwards. However we must carry on with their live in our hearts and their memories in our mind. Find peace in this hour of darkness with all the memories that you shared together.

Just a random thought as a past meme plagues my mind with its insignificant gesture of how much the world has changed. It said something about at one point only the rich had cars while the poor had horses and now only the rich had horses and the poor drive cars. It got me thinking about how times have really changed since the time that cars became more common.  We take it for granted being able to jump in our vehicles and just go. Go here, go there, go almost anywhere because of the ability of our vehicles. There are those who travel an hour or more everyday in their vehicles. Take their car away and they wouldn't have a job. A lot of people would not be able to have the jobs they currently hold without a vehicle to get them there. Then there are people like me who literally rely on vehicles to get a paycheck. Working at a car dealership, yeah, everything would be different... Not only work, but life in general. I don't know any week that their isn't a spot filled in my pe

I was thinking earlier today, really hard thinking actually. My mom had ordered my book and left it with me for a couple days so that I could write her a personalized message and sign it for her. I had a hard time figuring out what exactly to write. I wanted to write Thank you for everything. That is when I realized what that truly meant, and I believe that is what I really wrote. It got me to thinking about what everything meant. It includes believing in me, saving me, giving me life, etc. Everything always seemed to me just a way to summarize, but then I realized in one brief moment what it meant. We always use this word everything, for everything, but I wanted every person out there to actually take a moment to really think about the word everything. We have always used it, but have we actually sat down and realized what it meant. When someone says 'You mean everything to me' or 'Thank you for everything' do they take into consideration what everything is. Everything

Thank you all for the comments. I really appreciate them greatly and I hope to hear from more people. Keep sharing with your friends and I am glad to listen to other opinions of everything. I love to hear about what people think of certain subjects.  In high school, not that I was considered an outcast, okay maybe I was, but I think it was more because I was silent. I was quiet and reserved all throughout school. It didn't matter what I was doing I always carried my notebook and wrote all the time. I wrote mostly poetry and tried to write songs with no music. (I have no musical ability whatsoever, but I love it! It is what gets me through everyday. Possibly another topic for another time.) One thing that I did observe throughout those years are other people. I never realized it then, but other than normal studies to pass my classes, I studied other humans in their day to day lives. This is what I think finally made me start writing stories, other than my characters started screami

Just because I feel the need to vent: I'm sitting here reading all this "news" and I began wondering when did the United States of America become to big for its britches? It is clear that we have our nose in every other country's business, but why? Why should we have a say so in what this country is doing or that county isn't doing? We have so many problems in our own country, but yet our government is more concerned about the problems of the rest of the world. Why doesn't th e United States take a few steps back and look at our own problems and let the United Nations take care of the rest of the world. I mean that is what they were created for is it not? Why does the United States feel that they can just control the rest of the world? Who gave them this control? Why is it that the President thinks that he can control the world? I am so tired of this person from this country threatening this other person from this other country. I think instead of taking thous

Sometimes a writer doesn't hit a writers block, but rather the characters quit speaking to them. I am having a situation sort of like that. My characters have a mind of their own and when they decided to quite speaking to me I have still found it necessary to write about something, anything. This is going to be fun because I am looking for comments on some of these posts that will be coming from me. Some of these will be poetry, some just plain nonsense (just like this), there will be touchy subjects about everything from death to politics to corny random subjects. I hope that you all enjoy my rants. I am going to try to write something everyday to keep everyone's minds going on different subjects. If I miss a day or so please forgive me because my characters have probably spoken their mind of which direction they wish to take and it will be my job to get them there. I have several different stories being written currently which keeps my mind quite wrapped around itself, but s